Counting the Cost
Early Thursday afternoon, I grabbed the e-book edition of Counting the Cost from the library, intending to get to it later in the evening, maybe taking a day or so to read it. I’d read the first chapter on the Goodreads preview, so I took a minute to get the library download to the same place.
The next thing I knew, it was after five and I was finished with the book.
Wow, what a story.
I told Diana I’d read it and started trying to explain it, but couldn’t right away. I used words like heartbreaking and stunning and horrifying and inspiring.
I’d known the Duggars were very conservative and had over the last few years learned of the control the IBLP had over families. I hadn’t realized how bad it was for children in that denomination though. Who teaches their kids a code word to keep them from looking at people their parents disapprove of?
It troubles me to think of children being taught to avoid others the way the Duggars and other IBLP families do. How can you love others the way Jesus taught if you’re going to avoid the people you’re supposed to love on?
One of the big issues Jill and Derick Dillard struggled with was money. As the TV show about the Duggar family went through its various iterations, Jim Bob signed various agreements with TLC and Discovery regarding licensing and so forth. And this wasn’t a small amount of money. At one point, Jim Bob made a payment of $80,000 to each of the kids to catch them up. But that wasn’t all of the money. Jill and Derick had to threaten her parents with court to get the rest of the money as well as a full copy of the agreement Jim Bob had conned her into signing.
The whole thing has me shaking my head. I’m glad the kids are healing.

Sharenting
The Duggar saga ties in nicely to a Cosmo piece I read back in March.
There are thousands of families where the parents are vlogging, making social media posts, and signing branding deals worth thousands of dollars. The industry is valued at some US$21 billion. If that seems outlandish, consider that just one brand deal could be worth $6,000. Now triple that per month, and multiply that number by twelve.
Our kids used to joke with us about setting up a camera in the RV and posting videos to YouTube. That was back before anyone really understood what an influencer was. Diana and I thought about it briefly, but I just wasn’t thrilled about the structure and work required. I worried about the effects on the kids, too.
Fortesa Latifi’s “What’s the Price of a Childhood Turned Into Content?” takes a long look at the world of “sharenting,” or parenting via social media. She points out, among other things, that few states have any laws governing how much money influencer kids get from the deals. Illinois passed the first bill of its kind in August 2023. Ten other states have proposed bills similar to Illinois, but that’s the extent of any legislative action for now. California has long had the Coogan Law, but that seems to only apply when the child is working as an extra, background performer, or in a similar capacity through an agency or service.
Latifi also considers the idea of how broadcasting a childhood across social media changes the relationship between parent and child. Is this Mom talking to a child, or an employer talking to an employee? Where’s the line? What happens when the kid doesn’t want to do one more take of the clip you’ve been working on for the last three hours? One parent pressured their kid. “Do you want us to not be able to make our payment next month on the mortgage?”
Who puts that kind of pressure on their kid?
Cam Barrett’s mom posted their first menstrual cycle to social media, and they’re not the only kid that’s happened to.
What would you have your kids do to help earn $200,000 a year?
Latifi is a great journalist. Be sure to check out her other work, including the pieces linked from the Cosmo story.
I’m glad we didn’t go down this path with our kids.
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